Chapter 38- Holding the Line

             Every once in a while in a leadership position, there will be an uprising, a rebellion, or a storm before a calm. In order to maintain leadership in a certain group, one will have to face it sooner or later. It is considered to be a test of your skills. If you manage it well, all is well and you are still a respected leader. If you fail, you lose respect from the people and perhaps your leadership role as well.

            Back in my high school when I ran a club, I brought forward the motion of doing a carnival for fundraiser. Till this day, some members considered it as a big fail, while others could see the financial success. Truthfully, not many people attended the carnival, but on the profits side, we generated lots of revenue. Members who felt that it was a fail, organized a small group and pulled the vote for non-confidence card on me. How did I react? I rallied my support and wrote an essay speech to justify that even though it was first school carnival and little people showed up, it was a financial success. We were not in the red, but rather in the green zone. After a few days of explaining while rallying support, the vote for non-confidence was dropped. The following weeks were calm and enjoyable as we built up our norms.

            Another incident was during my gaming group. Since I had not been on for months during my crisis, a member stepped up to the plate and took my roles. However, when I got back, he had made so many changes that the group was an elite community. In my values, everyone should be equal and I had to scrap some of the changes. Since the member had been in leadership for a while, he had amassed a significant amount of support. So when I brought forth new changes, almost everyone was against me. I felt I had lost control of my group, but I did not lose hope. I called on veteran members who I’ve worked with long enough to trust them to assist me. After a month of discussions and negotiations, I was able to obtain my leadership once again whilst bringing new changes to the group to make it better and more fun. Till now, we have established a fun and friendly gaming group where you can socialize and meet new people.

            Those were the storms I encountered during each leadership role I took. Everyone is unsure and strangers at the beginning. Over time, people will say their differences and similarities. This is a clash between the groups. If it is resolved correctly, we all know how each other performs, likes, or dislikes. As a result, we have established understanding for each and everyone’s limits. Peace and normality would follow after the clash if it is done properly.

Chapter 6- Looking Beyond Imperfections

             You may have heard about not judging a book by its cover or that there’s more than meets the eye. In fact, it is very true although there may be first impressions. When judging a person, one must be able to look past the differences and see the person who they are inside.

            As you may have noticed thus far with my anonymity, I have not told you my name, color, race, if I had disabilities, or my religion. Why? Stereotypes in our world play a role in first impressions whether you’d like me or not. What can my name generally tell you? Perhaps my ethnicity and my religion. What if I told you my color? Perhaps some opinions whether or not you like me can be formed as a result of my color. What if I had a mental or physical disability? Do I get less respect because of that? We are all humans, the same inside, but different appearances. What about my beliefs in a greater being or none at all? Would you dislike me if I believed in some other god? The point I’m trying to make is that you probably started putting the puzzles together to see who I am because of commons stereotypes and societal values. Everyone should look beyond the imperfections that are formed and truly look at the person inside.

            There are many unique and interesting characteristics in all of us. Once you look past the cover and start to read the person, you’ll see the imperfections perfect. That’s the magical connection you can start building good and healthy relationships.

            If people in the world didn’t judge based on what you hear or see, but take the time to know somebody, everyone would have a great life. It sounds like another one of my utopias that isn’t going to become true. I could only dream so much and do so little.

            So why am I writing about this topic? Remember the girl from post-secondary? I did not have any connections or feelings for her. Slowly over time as I got to know her better with her caring personality, I start to grew fond of her and had feelings as well. I was seeing something so beautiful within; which has changed my views after that moment in time. I grew more understanding and patient for others. A simple analogy would be opening up an oyster. Hard to crack the shell, but soft on the inside. Whether you find and see the pearl is strictly up to you.

            Some days when I go on Facebook, I still glance at the girl from post-secondary. I miss the good old days when we chatted at school and each day she became prettier than before as I got to know her more. I feel like I am so attached and attracted to her. Sad thing is I don’t feel she has had the connection I got from her. I just can’t let go of her. Perhaps I should, perhaps I shouldn’t. But if you are on the pursuit of happiness, what can you do? Chase her? Find another similar girl? Or both? That will be something that I will need to decide for a while.