An Angel (A Short Story)

            Do you remember the day when you saw someone for the very first time and you felt like you’ve seen an angel? I have, but that moment was very short-lived.

            It was back in the days when I was when I was still a freshman taking my regular public transit to my school. I always sat in the very front of the bus where usually all the adults were seated and the rowdy teenagers sat in the back. To be honest, I was afraid to sit in the back due to the common stereotype that if you were “looking for trouble”, then you’d go there. Another reason why I sat in the front was that I wanted to see my stop in case the bus fills up and I can’t look out.

            One typical Friday morning waiting at the bus stop, there was someone I met which was still clear in my mind up till now. I got on the bus and greeted the same driver who known me over the past few months. I took my usual seat on the second row behind driver and looked out the window like I always did. Traffic was a mess day even though people were scrambling about in their vehicles heading for work in the rush hour.

            That day, something was different. A deviation had occurred in the daily norms. There was traffic accident in the middle of the intersection where most of the teenagers on the bus got off to shop at the malls. The driver turned left from the traffic under the directions of the police and began to make amends to the regular bus route. People on the bus carried worried looks on their faces as passengers were panicking whether or not they’d be late for work while students looked tense and nervous.

            I, on the other hand, was quite calm and collected. It was weird because I knew I was going to be late for my classes, but I was not worried at all. Everyone else on the bus was gazing out the windows trying to figure out what other means of transportation to take. The cell phones ringing, the texting, the chatting, and the not-so-quiet whispering seemed to blend with the chaotic traffic outside. The loud mixture of noise mixed so melodiously that I tuned out. It was a unique day and that’s what I liked about it. Change, that was the word that I wanted to describe. A change in the daily routine made the day much more interesting and adventurous. Not knowing what was going to happen made my heart accelerate to the unknown thrills of life. The intensity, gosh, it was something that I had been missing out over these few yours.

            The bus halted to a stop to pickup some irregular passengers who were madly waving at the driver. It was an elderly couple who seemed to be tourists for the parade downtown by the way they dressed. Even though the stop was not on our route, the driver gladly welcomed them onboard. I looked at the couple having difficulty getting onto the bus and immediately realized that the bus was full. So, I offered my seat to the couple and grabbed a railing. Just as the bus doors were about to close, a party of children ran up to the bus. The teacher apparently seemed to be taking her students on a field trip because she was handing out bus tickets for the children and doing a headcount. The driver again, gladly accepted the group onto the bus and the children piled into the bus. I had no choice but to move to the back of the bus to make space for the new passengers.

            In my head, I was feeling slightly uncomfortable because I had never moved to the rear of the bus thinking that I’d get into trouble. There were two high school jocks who each took two seats and a girl with purple hair writing on the back of a seat. I turned my eyes away in terror of getting their attention and saw another teenager who had tattoos on his arms. He stared at me looking as if he wanted to pick a fight, so I quickly turned my head to the other side pretending to look for my stop.

            And that was when I saw her. She sat next to the window reading a textbook. What stood out to me was her looks especially in the crowd of intimidating people around me. Like a bright moon in the dark night, she carried an aura. An energy that was lively followed by warmth. Her golden blonde hair gave her a crown marking royalty and her brown eyes complimented perfectly reducing the unnecessary attraction from other people. As I stared in awe of such a sight of beauty, she turned her head and looked at me. She must have felt someone watching her. When her eyes matched mine, I saw something in her eyes that could make any man’s heart melt. I smiled with a blush and quickly turned away before I died from shyness.

            What did I see in her crystal eyes? I saw myself…I saw myself with her and living the happiest days of my life. I saw the pure innocence and the beauty that every man dreamt of…which was a loving companionship. As I turned my head to look at her, she had already got up from her seat and was about to step off the bus. When the bus doors closed and the bus drove by her, she turned her head to me and gave me a warm smile like she had acknowledged my existence on the crowded bus. I smiled back with a light grin on my face and the bus drove away.

            That was it. I never got her name or her contact so that we may meet again. What I learned from that was that from the things you don’t expect or the places you don’t go, you’ll miss out a lot of opportunities. It was by pure luck that the normal chain of events was disrupted and I had been given the chance to learn from this. Although it was a missed connection, I believe angels do exist in this world that are here to aid us and give us a new meaning of hope and insight towards our daily lives.

Chapter 48- Taking Higher Grounds

         Some people change and some don’t. What’s important for me is making sure I am who I am. I will make changes if necessary in order to improve myself and how I want people to treat me.

         One day at work, I got called to the big boss’ office to have a meeting. The big boss and a supervisor came to meet me saying that I had failed my probation at the department I was in. The boss who picked on me whom I’ve been talking about in previous chapters didn’t like my performance as well as another coworker who was a mother. Eventually, only two young girls were left in that department and I knew he liked the young girls. The big boss said that previous department that I used to work with wanted to give me a second chance. I was going to move back to my original department and also have my probation extended for an extra month.

            For me, I believe in self improvement and I wanted to know exactly how I had failed. The big boss said that I would have to wait a few hours before he got to work. I waited and finally saw him. He and another supervisor sat down with me to discuss. He said that he did not have to give me the reason why I failed or even tell me. I responded by saying that I wanted to know what I did wrong so that I can improve. Still no answer, but instead he yelled at me for saying that I wanted to improve when it was too late and I didn’t improve when I was working with him. He told me that he had the final say after talking with other supervisors and leads. He also mentioned that it wasn’t personal because if it was, I wouldn’t have stayed in his department that long. Deep down in my mind, I knew it was personal since the very first day he said he was going to be pick on me more because I was a guy. He only wanted girls to work with him and only the young ones. I thanked him for his support while I was in his department and requested a reference. He didn’t want to give me one and simply referred it to my big boss. I shook his hand and walked out feeling upset.

            The big boss was outside and asked me to have a chat. The first thing he said was that I shouldn’t worry about my probation and that I can pass. Next he said that my boss shouldn’t have raised his voice at me because I haven’t done any thing that’s wrong significantly. He leveled down with me and said to look at him now. He was my big boss. H e said that one day I might be a boss or his boss or the boss of the company. I felt inspired and became emotional. This was a good boss, a good man. He is who I envision to be a true leader.

            That night, I was upset yet inspired. I realized one thing; I was going to let this all go. There was no point in holding a grudge against my sexist boss. The actions he had made were unjust and unfair. He was too hardened to feel for others. I’m not going to be mad at him or act differently when I see him. I was going to be a better man and take the higher grounds with my morals and ethics intact.

Chapter 41- Adapt to Change

             In the world that we live in, change is constantly occurring. Most of the changes affects our daily norms or just push us out of the comfort zone. Most of the times, we just have to adapt to survive in this harsh environment.

            One example would be my work environment. It is a fast-paced and hostile environment. Going to work without my body armor proved to be deadly for me. After a few weeks, I had to adapt to the environment to survive. I would put on my body armor before work and take it off after work. The first few days were hard to adjust, but after a continuous pattern, I’ve established it as a norm. I think this adaptation is good for my own mental and physical health as well as having a job. It may not seem like a good job, but it’s a stepping stone to my career.

            Another change that I had to adapt was the time when I resumed leadership position in my gaming group. There was a new chatting system and a new website for doing our business. Although I was unfamiliar with the system for the chat and the website, I adapted to the change and went along with it. This change allowed our gaming group to be more active, social, and more fun. The easy accessibility of that chat allowed us to know more about the other members and establish friendships.

            From my experience, change is constant. In order to thrive in this world, one must adapt and establish new norms. If we continue to stay within our comfort zone and don’t step out of it, we are behind and missing out of the potential opportunities. Take a leap of faith and walk forward to adapt to new changes as they occur in your life. It may seem like a bad choice in the beginning, but it’s worth it.

Chapter 38- Holding the Line

             Every once in a while in a leadership position, there will be an uprising, a rebellion, or a storm before a calm. In order to maintain leadership in a certain group, one will have to face it sooner or later. It is considered to be a test of your skills. If you manage it well, all is well and you are still a respected leader. If you fail, you lose respect from the people and perhaps your leadership role as well.

            Back in my high school when I ran a club, I brought forward the motion of doing a carnival for fundraiser. Till this day, some members considered it as a big fail, while others could see the financial success. Truthfully, not many people attended the carnival, but on the profits side, we generated lots of revenue. Members who felt that it was a fail, organized a small group and pulled the vote for non-confidence card on me. How did I react? I rallied my support and wrote an essay speech to justify that even though it was first school carnival and little people showed up, it was a financial success. We were not in the red, but rather in the green zone. After a few days of explaining while rallying support, the vote for non-confidence was dropped. The following weeks were calm and enjoyable as we built up our norms.

            Another incident was during my gaming group. Since I had not been on for months during my crisis, a member stepped up to the plate and took my roles. However, when I got back, he had made so many changes that the group was an elite community. In my values, everyone should be equal and I had to scrap some of the changes. Since the member had been in leadership for a while, he had amassed a significant amount of support. So when I brought forth new changes, almost everyone was against me. I felt I had lost control of my group, but I did not lose hope. I called on veteran members who I’ve worked with long enough to trust them to assist me. After a month of discussions and negotiations, I was able to obtain my leadership once again whilst bringing new changes to the group to make it better and more fun. Till now, we have established a fun and friendly gaming group where you can socialize and meet new people.

            Those were the storms I encountered during each leadership role I took. Everyone is unsure and strangers at the beginning. Over time, people will say their differences and similarities. This is a clash between the groups. If it is resolved correctly, we all know how each other performs, likes, or dislikes. As a result, we have established understanding for each and everyone’s limits. Peace and normality would follow after the clash if it is done properly.

Chapter 35- The Crystal Ball

             I wonder about my future most of the time. Is it going to be better or worse the next day? Sometimes I wonder if I want to know my future, but I worry that I may not like it. Perhaps once I know the future, it will change because I have seen it.

            An example of how a future can change once I look into is if I get a fortune teller or psychic to tell my future. If I asked about my current career and how far I’d go and they said that my current job is only temporary, I would act a certain way. Because I was given a future, now I may begin looking for other jobs and lose interest and faith in my current job. If they said that I will stay in this job, I will think that I will have this job as a permanent position and perhaps be more focused at work. Basically, knowing the future will change a person’s attitude and the way they do things.

            Sometimes I want to know the future, but I think it ruins all the surprises you would have each day. Would it be better if I planned for a future instead of seeing the future? I think that’s another alternative. I can plan for what I want to have and what to occur, but not knowing if it works or not. That way, the future can’t change because I haven’t seen the future, but rather planned a route to a final destination. Instead of seeing if I will obtain happiness in my life, I would do the things that make me happy in order to achieve happiness whether or not I reach my goal in the future or not.

            The future, always changing and unpredictable. I guess that’s one of the mysteries in life. Perhaps the constant change is a good thing. Perhaps it’s a way of setting out someone’s fate and destiny. Or maybe the change is there just to screw you up so that you can learn from your own mistakes. I guess I will really never know…

Chapter 19- A Friend I Once Knew

             My friend from secondary school who helped run my club was not who I knew anymore. When I met him in grade nine, he was a smart, hardworking, and caring person. Now that I look at the present, his smartness became cockiness. Hardworking to procrastinating or laziness. His caring nature became a selfish one.

            This all changed within two years after the first time I met him. How is it possible? I can only presume from some information I have gathered from other friends. One, it can be because he is in a relationship now and forgot his duties as the leader of the club. Two, he has lost interest in taking a leadership role. Three, he has forgotten to take off his body armor and have become too absorbed with himself. I will never know if it’s all of the above, one of them, or none at all.

            The more and more changes he has made to his personality, the more and more I start to lose respect for a great guy I used to know. I liked him the way he was before, but I will never know what has made him change so quickly. Even though it seems like the symptoms of having body armor, I can never be sure. It’s sad how a great guy can fall in just two years time.

            I wonder if I will be like him in the future or different. I want to maintain who I am now. A responsible, outgoing, caring, honest, and a unique person. To be respected within the community and to be liked by all people. This is going to be part of my journey to happiness.

            The friend I use to know was smart and humble. He would listen to other’s ideas without asking rhetorical questions about your intelligence. He used to complete tasks within a timeframe, but now they are all excuses on why he can’t complete them at all or on time. He was once a caring friend who helped me talk about issues in my life. No matter what the issues were, he would set the time for me to talk to him. Now he is just so occupied with his life, that he doesn’t have the time for me or anything else.

            It’s sad how you can lose a friend in just two years time because of a personality change. I personally think he has forgotten to take off his armor, but I will never know. Perhaps in the future, we would be good friends again…