Chapter 17- My Readers

             I am very thankful for you not walking away and continuing to read my stories. Your support in me has been greatly appreciated as I continue on to write more chapters.

            This chapter is dedicated to my readers who’ve shown me that people out there still care. That in this reality, out of the negative, there is a positive. You know who you are. I hope that some of these chapters may be similar in your lives so that you and I know that we are not alone. If none of the chapters relate to you, that’s fine. Perhaps you are living the dream.

            We all have our goals in this life. Some different and some the same. No matter what our goal is, we try to achieve it. Sometimes it is the impossible, but does that mean we should give up? If you are not going to pursue it, you will never know if you will achieve it. My goal is the pursuit of happiness. It’s a direction, but all the little things build up towards the goal of happiness.

            I hope you will share these stories to the world to see. Show your friends, families, or even strangers. Your network will not know who exactly I am, but they will know that I’m a person telling my stories during a tough time in my life. This is the reason why I am still anonymous at this point. I want others to read and relate if possible while not being judgmental of who I am, what I do, and where I come from. In the society we live, there will always be some hate speech, but the intensity of the hate will be lessened since it’s not directed at me due to my anonymity.

            So, share my stories with others. Let us help each other out. If you don’t want to share, I respect your decision. I would like to thank you for keeping up with me till now and I hope that you will continue to read my following chapters. Thank you for your kindness.

Chapter 11- The Truthful Way

             Many people find me very honest. I am not a good liar either. Why? I believe in telling the truth. Although people say the truth hurts, I find it necessary to be honest. If you something to be done, you have to be direct. Many people don’t like hearing the truth because sometimes the way one puts it can be so blunt.

            From my standpoint, honesty goes a long way. Someone who is reliable and trustworthy is the products of honesty. In my experience in telling people the truth, I would ask them if they wanted to hear a sweeter, but vague truth, or a direct cold truth. For example, if someone asked me if what they are wearing to a graduation dinner is suitable or not. Sweet version? I would say that the suit looks nice, but perhaps a different suit would suit them better. Cold truth? Honestly, I don’t think that suit is a good choice. Everyone is wearing business casual, so it might be a good idea to blend in. However, it is my truthful opinion, so it’s up to you to decide what you want to wear. Either ways, I’ve shown in the example includes me talking honestly. One indirect and the other more direct.

           With the truth, there is a limit one person can take in each day. The good truth is unlimited, but the bad truth is limited. If you have a lot of bad truth to tell a person, you must determine their mood first. Are they open to feedback? Although indirect truth seems easier, but it’s not going to help them or you. The cold truth is the better way as long as you provide constructive feedback. There’s no point in telling them they have a bad attitude if you’re not going to tell them how to fix it. For me, I want to be a good friend and not a person who’s just there to judge and point out problems.

            When telling the truth, I would make sure I have not offended them and state that it is the truth from my perspective as others may have different views. If they are fine with themselves, don’t keep forcing the truth on them. Perhaps you may be right, but never attack their confidence and self-esteem.

            Honesty is the best policy. That phrase is only true if you abide to the boundaries of each person. The truth is only our perception and in order for the truth to be useful, we must give constructive feedback. It’s up to you if you want to give direct truth or indirect truth. Never lash out at their confidence and self-esteem or you will lose their trust and respect. Perhaps you may even lose a friend.

Chapter 6- Looking Beyond Imperfections

             You may have heard about not judging a book by its cover or that there’s more than meets the eye. In fact, it is very true although there may be first impressions. When judging a person, one must be able to look past the differences and see the person who they are inside.

            As you may have noticed thus far with my anonymity, I have not told you my name, color, race, if I had disabilities, or my religion. Why? Stereotypes in our world play a role in first impressions whether you’d like me or not. What can my name generally tell you? Perhaps my ethnicity and my religion. What if I told you my color? Perhaps some opinions whether or not you like me can be formed as a result of my color. What if I had a mental or physical disability? Do I get less respect because of that? We are all humans, the same inside, but different appearances. What about my beliefs in a greater being or none at all? Would you dislike me if I believed in some other god? The point I’m trying to make is that you probably started putting the puzzles together to see who I am because of commons stereotypes and societal values. Everyone should look beyond the imperfections that are formed and truly look at the person inside.

            There are many unique and interesting characteristics in all of us. Once you look past the cover and start to read the person, you’ll see the imperfections perfect. That’s the magical connection you can start building good and healthy relationships.

            If people in the world didn’t judge based on what you hear or see, but take the time to know somebody, everyone would have a great life. It sounds like another one of my utopias that isn’t going to become true. I could only dream so much and do so little.

            So why am I writing about this topic? Remember the girl from post-secondary? I did not have any connections or feelings for her. Slowly over time as I got to know her better with her caring personality, I start to grew fond of her and had feelings as well. I was seeing something so beautiful within; which has changed my views after that moment in time. I grew more understanding and patient for others. A simple analogy would be opening up an oyster. Hard to crack the shell, but soft on the inside. Whether you find and see the pearl is strictly up to you.

            Some days when I go on Facebook, I still glance at the girl from post-secondary. I miss the good old days when we chatted at school and each day she became prettier than before as I got to know her more. I feel like I am so attached and attracted to her. Sad thing is I don’t feel she has had the connection I got from her. I just can’t let go of her. Perhaps I should, perhaps I shouldn’t. But if you are on the pursuit of happiness, what can you do? Chase her? Find another similar girl? Or both? That will be something that I will need to decide for a while.